Memo to Bryan Hitch
Dear Mr. Hitch,
Congratulations. You have a DVD player and a pause button. That's great. Now, instead of drawing Sam "Scenery Chewer" Jackson and Patrick "Better Than This" Stewart over and over again, how about drawing some comic books? Shit, Ultimates 2 is some bloated, boring junk.
Your pal,
Comics Should Be Good
----------
Two short bits from me before I head to bed.
1. I'm updating my own blog again, including a bunch of photos from this weekend's party attended by no fewer than six contributers and fans of this blog. Check it out.
2. Even future sisters-in-law love New Frontier. It's the best.
Congratulations. You have a DVD player and a pause button. That's great. Now, instead of drawing Sam "Scenery Chewer" Jackson and Patrick "Better Than This" Stewart over and over again, how about drawing some comic books? Shit, Ultimates 2 is some bloated, boring junk.
Your pal,
Comics Should Be Good
----------
Two short bits from me before I head to bed.
1. I'm updating my own blog again, including a bunch of photos from this weekend's party attended by no fewer than six contributers and fans of this blog. Check it out.
2. Even future sisters-in-law love New Frontier. It's the best.
posted by Mr. Rice at 1/17/2005 09:37:00 PM
27 Comments:
Thank you for that, Joe.
I want daily content on this site, consarnit!!!
And since you posted that, I don't have to write a new entry.
Good man!
And yes, Bryan Hitch...seriously, making characters look like movie stars is funny...but "funny" doesn't exactly make sense in the middle of a dramatic series.
You shouldn't be distracted during each panel by "hey, he looks just like ____!"
And how odd is Shannon Elizabeth's boyfriend/husband insisting that she allow her likeness to appear in an issue of Ultimates?
By the by, did you know that your future sister-in-law has essentially the same exact name as my girlfriend?
Jake, Jake, Jake.
Yes, Nick has been "cast" as Sam since issue one, "volume" one. And it was midly amusing during THAT ISSUE. Afterwards it became distracting and silly. Now we get a FULL PAGE PORTRAIT of a shitty actor who nerds love because he likes Star Wars. It didn't so much raise eyebrows this time as, "Ah, Christ, enough of this."
"If you think about it, more happened to advance the plot in #2 than in #1."
And a slap to the face hurts less than a kick to the nuts. That doesn't mean either one is actually good. Ultimates is a comic book version of a Bruckheimer film, except that the first two and a half acts of the film is just people spouting bad dialogue that the writer thinks is good dialogue. Pop culture references doesn't make you a good writer; they don't even make you Quentin Tarentino. They just make you . . .Kevin Smith.
The Magneto siblings scene: your defense is that it was "only" two pages? Come on, Jake. Millar "edgily" moves forward one of his little ideas for TWO PAGES and it's still a silly, insulting idea. The Cap/Thor sequence was the ONLY one with any kind of real conflict or drama, and one per book just isn't cutting it.
"I mean, negative reviews are kinda funny for a few seconds, so I suppose you're provinding some form of entertainment, but I generally stop reading something when I become disappointed with it."
I notice you've never said that when anyone trashed a book you didn't like either. Nobody likes to see something they like shat upon. Trust me, my reviewer copies aren't hurting my wallet. And Ultimates 2 is a shit book.
You get reviewer copies?
Bastard.
You don't think I'd actually pay money for this crap do you?
ULTIMATES 2 is a shame. A shameful shame. To have an artist as dynamic and talented as Hitch drawing 24 pages of conversation is beyond me. I don't get it at all. Not that I need constant action, but this book is just plain DULL. The plot has advanced ere inches, and the only interesting plotline (thor crazy?) is getting dragged out like a bad soap opera. Millar is claremonting the shit out of this book.
That's a new verb, by the way: "claremonting". I will post on that now.
-a
Hm. I wouldn't exactly say that "no explodo" is my complaint, and it's condescending to say so. My complaint is that NOTHING happens, either action or real development. Characters TALK in false-clever ways. Characters are drawn to resemble movie stars. And that's IT.
It's not like Ultimates is a high-minded comic. It's a dumb-as-rocks action book, that doesn't even do THAT well.
Here's the thing about Ultimates: despite the amount of sitting-and-talking, it's got the intellectual accomplishment of a mid-range summer blockbuster, which is to say, jack shit. However, the blockbuster style action is saved for every few issues or so. It's not that I don't know what to expect from it, Ultimates doesn't know what it is.
And Sam Jackson isn't Shaft. Sam Jackson's the motherfucker who pretended to be Shaft when Richard Roundtree was too busy kicking ass and making sex.
Well, yeah, I do. I've got every issue and I've read it. I can analyze it. It's a whole lot of talking punctuated with action scenes. It's shock as "characterization." It's cultural references as "hipness/depth."
It's a shitty comic.
1. If it weren't MY opinion I wouldn't bother typing it.
2. Because it is my opinion and I'm a learned master of comic critiquery, it is also fact.
3. Ultimates is a shit of a pop comic with a good artist and a starwhore burned out writer with nothing interesting left to say.
Ooooh, incest!
I don't know.
Cunard was the one that showed me.
On that same note, can I even put links up if I wanted to?
Yeah, just go to the editing stuff at blogger.
All it lets me do is make posts and edit those posts.
I can't "Change Settings."
Greetings and salutations, fellow dorks.
If anyone wants the easy-to-code thing I've been sending to new bloggers from CBR, e-mail me. Shit, If I can do it, anyone can. So, anyone who wants it, let me know. That goes for you too, Jake, even if I don't know you and you like The Ultimates.
For this particular collective of dorks, though... you all need to be considered "blog administrators" or something. Whoever started the actual blog needs to set everyone up as administrators under the members section in the blogger manager.
So what you're saying, Ed, is that Joe has set himself up as a fascist dictator of this blog?
Sounds about right.
SILENCE PEONS!
There should be more pictures of me around here . . .
Its so interesting article..Thanks for sharing..
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